Sunday, September 9, 2012

Why do bad things happen to good people?

That question has been on my mind a lot lately. I feel like every time I'm on facebook or reading blogs or talking to people there is always something awful going on in peoples lives. infertility, disease, death, stillbirths, accidents, natural disaster, divorce, job loss, and the list goes on and on.
Over the summer, one of my very dearest friends lost her little brother in a tragic drowning accident. I wasn't particularly close to the brother because he was so many years younger than us but it was still hard for me to take. It was hard knowing that somebody I love has such an intense grief. It was hard because that question kept coming to my mind... WHY? why do bad things happen to good people? And this isn't even a case of a bad thing happening to good people. this was a horrific tragedy happening to one of the most amazing and exemplary families I have ever known.
More recently, some of our friends here in Eugene lost their young nephew to childhood cancer. I never met this boy or his immediate family but knowing his wonderful Aunt and Uncle the question comes to me again. Why do these awful things happen to GOOD people? It's just not fair. Maybe it's a lack of faith on my part but it's hard to look at some of these things and not question why.
In my questioning I have made a few realizations. And maybe my thoughts are completely wrong but at least to me they bring some comfort.
We were sent to earth to be tested. We are given trials and weaknesses to help us draw closer to God by overcoming them through Him and through our Savior, Jesus Christ. Or we can take them the other way and use our trials and weaknesses as a way to blame God or become further away from Him.
One thing that has crossed my mind is that God is not going to give us a trial or hardship that is too much for us to bear. I also believe that God is not going to always and only give us trials that are easy for us to bear, that isn't the point of trials after all. As I had said earlier, my friend and her family are great examples. Erica is one of the greatest women I have met and will ever meet, always striving to be righteous, always striving to please God. Maybe for her and her family, a trial of this magnitude is what they had to have to truly test their strong faith.
As I attended the funeral I was amazed at the strength of the family. Both parents spoke and addressed the crowd of many mourning people with such strength. I can't think of another word besides pure strength to describe it. And then as I discussed it with Erica she had no questions of why, no bitterness, no anger. She simply relayed faith in God's plan, such GREAT faith. It was such a great example to me regarding accepting God's will. Seeing her parents speak at the funeral I thought what great examples of faith they are setting for everybody in attendance when they themselves are the ones suffering from tragedy. I can't think of another family who would have displayed such great examples of faith in the same situation. Maybe everybody else needed to see such faith and strength in the midst of an awful hardship.
I don't know all the answers, nobody does, and it's hard to understand God's plan all of the time but even though we don't always understand that doesn't mean we can't have faith.
Back in high school Erica shared a quote with me that I have loved ever since. Her mother also shared it at the funeral.
"Sometimes the Lord calms the storm, and sometimes He lets the storm rage and calms His child...We learn lessons from storms that we cannot learn from calm seas...When we find ourselves in these stroms, we should remember we don't have enough energy to complain and still keep our head above water. Our duty is to swim, not wonder or complain. We need to get to shore and must leave the reasons for the storm with the Lord. If all the effort we put into asking why were used in swimming, a lot more of us, with His help, would reach shore." -Elder Groberg
I love it.  Apparently I need to stop asking and work on my swimming! I don't think my days of asking "why do bad things happen to good people?" are over but certainly through these experiences I have an increase in faith that God's plan, trials and all, is perfect. 

Wednesday, September 5, 2012

Welcome BACK home

I think I have proven to be awful at this. I have been putting off posting because the task of recapping the entire summer seems so daunting! So I will do a quick replay
  • Family time, LOTS of it! We stayed in my parents basement and everybody loved it.

Tyler and Scott are thrilled about family reunions, obviously
  • Attending the Millville 4th ward which I'm convinced is the best ward in the history of the church
  • Trips to Bear Lake and Hyrum Dam. I had the privilege of being the recipient of the MOST epic wedgie of all time as a result of a wipeout.
cousins on the banana

  • Summerfest!
  • Taylor's wedding! The wedding was beautiful and Taylor looked amazing. They got married at the Alumni House at Utah State. It was so fun to be a part of. Did I cry? oh heck yeah. Did Scott cry? yes, obscene amounts. Her pictures were done by the talented Eric Richards at Izlas
Here comes the Bride
Gettin hitched!
My contribution? tears
Sisters! I seriously LOVE my sister-in-laws
Me and Scott
It was such a fun wedding!
  • Another wedding! Scott's good friend Andrew got hitched. It's the first sealing we have been to since our own :) Also the first time I have ever been to the GIANT Mt. Timpanogos Temple.

  • Fireworks
I'm so tan, I know

  • Eating at all the Logan/Utah only eateries that I miss oh so much, Ficklin Family Trivia, Laser tag date (SO FUN!) , playing with Porter and Byron, lots of golfing for Scott, Twizleberry,
Triple date - laser tag and ice cream. SUCH a blast

Cleaning the sink for Taylor's bridal shower
  • oh yeah, working. We both worked... yipee.
Overall it was a great summer! Our last summer break really since Scott will be done with school this Spring. Speaking of, did you notice our lovely Caribbean Cowndown up on top?? We've booked a cruise and I couldn't be more excited!!! It's still SO far away but I'm looking forward to it. It takes off from San Juan, Puerto Rico and goes to 4 other islands. We're going with Scott's family for graduation. Can't wait!!!

We're settling back into Eugene and school/work. It's fun being back on our own turf. We, of course, went to the first game of the season at Autzen Stadium. GO DUCKS! 

but more importantly, GO AGGIES!!
This is long lost picture from last year when the boys were born.  Everybody in their Aggie gear!

Tuesday, April 3, 2012

Welcome Home

well folks, it's official! We are coming back to Logan for the summer and I couldn't be more happy or excited. Scott will be working in the County Attorney's office just like he did last summer which he is excited about. He really enjoyed his time there last summer and got some really good experience. He will also be working in the Athletic Department at Utah State under the compliance officer. I don't really know much about what he will be doing but if it's USU and it's athletics then I'm sure he will love it. And we're of course excited to be surrounded by the beautiful Logan scenery.
awww it's so beautiful :)  can't wait to get back there!
We were going back and forth for a while about what I was going to do. Should I quit my job or stick it out here for the few summer months while Scott was working in Logan. It was hard because I have a really great job, I enjoy my work, I get along great with the people I work with, I am finally feeling like I fit in and I'm not the new girl. I did not want to quit SUCH a fab job just to be on the job hunt again in three months here in Oregon.
I also have this loyalty complex when it comes to work. I feel so loyal to a job, I always have. This is the 3rd job I've had and my other 2 I had for over 3 years each. I can't just quit for the sake of quitting, I can't! I was feeling really bad. I kept going back and forth between going and not going. and obviously finances is a factor for us too. I was so stressed about it!!
I went to talk to my boss about it and see what the prospects of possibly getting my job again when I came back. She was so understanding and made me feel okay. She even said to me "you do what you need to do and I'll understand. I know that jobs come and go but family is always there." how great right? I knew I had to go. When it came right down to it I knew that I would be miserable if I stayed. I would like everyday why didn't I do. 
Since then things have just fallen perfectly into place and I will be able to return to work when we get back. I'm feeling so blessed that everything has just worked out so perfectly. and couldn't be more excited to come to Logan and squeeze these chubby cheeks!
We are most likely going to be living with my parents. A few weeks ago I had a recipe exchange with the other law wives and well over half are living with parents over the summer so I don't feel too bad :)

In other news:
Our Spring Break trip to Newport was really fun! They weather was nice the first night so we walked down on the beach (our hotel was literally on the sand). We also went to the Oregon Coast Aquarium and ate a lot of food of course. It was a really nice and relaxing weekend.
From our balcony!
I had my foot surgery and it went really well! The procedure was really quick and I have had virtually no pain since. I've had to wear a very horrendous walking boot thing which is annoying but I get my stitches out Thursday and hopefully I can graduate from the boot. 
 Here I am waking up from the anesthesia. I kept laughing really hard for no reason at all... weird. 

And last but not least, my parents and Tyler are coming to visit this weekend!!  We are really excited to show them around Eugene and teach them how to recycle and love trees and eat organic :)  Should be a good time! 

Saturday, March 10, 2012

Death Breath

We had been in Oregon about 6 weeks before I got a job.  I applied and sent I don't know how many resumes before something finally happened.  I feel so blessed because I was able to get a really great job that I enjoy! It's not exactly in my field of broadcast journalism but it'll do for now.  I work the front desk a medial office. There are 5 doctors and 2 physician assistants so it's always pretty busy.  I check-in patients, do paperwork, answer phones, all the front desk stuff which means dealing with all sorts of people.
Like these lovely ladies

 Our doctors are pain management doctors so our patients have chronic pain which usually equals grumpy. Most people I can handle and most situations don't frazzle me too much but the other day I almost lost it with one patient.
It was an older woman who seemed harmless as she approached my desk. She was there with her husband and it was the end of the morning shift, almost lunch time, so my stomach was getting upset because I was hungry.  I quickly greeted her and welcomed her. Then I made the mistake of asking her a question which meant she had to talk... BIG MISTAKE! The second she opened her mouth I could smell it, her awful breath. I don't even know how to describe the way it smelled. It was just BAD! not bad, it was terrible, awful, horrendous, THE WORST EVER!

 I was trying to keep our conversation as short as possible so I wouldn't have to deal with it. I was trying to discreetly hold my hand over my nose in a way that wasn't obvious to her but was still protecting me. That seemed to be working well. I was holding back gagging, I could feel it in my throat but was doing a good job of keeping my composure. Then the moment came where I had to hand her the clipboard. The protection of my hand over my nose was now gone, I was in a very vulnerable place. I was explaining one of the forms to her and then it happened. right in the middle of my words, a very audible and obvious gag. Not even a gag but a straight up HEAVE! I couldn't stop it before it happened! "When your done filling it out make sure to sign and date at the boooahhhhooohhhhhhhhttom." I was kinda mortified but the lady seemed like she didn't even notice. Maybe people dry heave in her direction all the time, wouldn't surprise me based on the circumstances. I was legitimately concerned about throwing up at this point. Then the lady decides she is going to fill out the short form while standing at the desk, NOOOOOO! Luckily I could go back to covering my nose. As soon as she retreated to the waiting room I told my coworker I had to run to the bathroom. I seriously RAN. to spare you the details I didn't actually throw up but there was definitely heaving. FROM A PERSONS BREATH! then I got thinking... they are going to take this lady to small little room and close the door for however long until the doctor is ready to see her and when the doctor goes in and closes the door behind him he is going to DIE. seriously die. I honestly have no idea how they handle stuff like that... ugghhh.  I felt sick for the rest of the shift. so gross. how can a person not realize something like that? How can her husband be in a car with her? I was so perplexed the rest of the day about how somebody's breath could get so bad, so so bad. so please people, brush your teeth.

Our lives continue on like normal, I go to work everyday, Scott goes to school everyday, and I cook fabulous meals every night and keep the house spotless (ha)  We've been having fun lately too. Baseball season for the Oregon Ducks has started so we've been going to games. It's a nice date night because Scott is a student so it is 100% free for us to go and the stadium is in walking distance. perffect.

For Valentines Day Scott got us tickets to Beauty and the Beast! (broadway style) so we went last week and loved it. Our friends, the Jordans, another law school couple and also in our ward, got tickets too so we went to dinner with them before the show. We took some pictures but haven't downloaded the camera, maybe later. It was such a fun thing to do. LOVED it.

Things that are coming up include Scott's spring break! because I work full time we couldn't go home :( I wish. But we are going to get away for the weekend. We are going to Newport, OR with another law school couple for a little weekend getaway. I'm really excited! I've only been the coast a couple times and Newport is one of the best coastal towns (so we've heard) should be fun.
  • Other updates... I'm having surgery on my foot on the 26th. Just getting a tailors bunion taken care of, I had my right foot done in high school and the other foot decided it needed some attention too.
  • I got called to play the piano in the primary. I enjoy the piano so it's fun and the kids are, of course, to die for. I'm really rusty because I haven't played consistently for LONG time but it's coming back to me.
  • How excited are you for The Hunger Games movie!?!
  • I got a new computer. My laptop started shoot out flames when you would plug the charger into the computer. not just sparks but FLAMES. yikes. We got a little netbook for me. I call it a baby lappy. I'm obviously have a large vocabulary when it comes to technology. so far so good! As long as I can watch TV shows online then I'm good :)
Well that's all for now I suppose. I'll *hopefully* get better at posting... we'll see! We are doing well but constantly yearn for Logan. In fact, tonight Scott asked me what I wanted for dinner and I said turkey supreme sub and italian salad from Papa Kelsey's, yummmmm. My mother in law makes fun for me for missing the food that Logan has to offer. haha, she has a point. If anybody feels the need to mail a loaf of pumpkin chocolate chip or cinnamon burst bread from Old Grist Mill feel free :)

Tuesday, January 10, 2012

Roller Coaster Christmas Break

I'm the worst at blogging.  But I can't feel too bad since I'm not confident that more than 7 people even read it!
For Christmas we got to go to Utah to spend time with our families.  I was able to take the week between Christmas and New Years off so we had a nice visit.  There were some ups and downs while we were there.

The Ups:
1. Spending time with these little guys!!  My nephews, Porter and Byron.  The only other time we have seen them was when they were about 3 weeks old so they are HUGE to us now.  They are so darn cute.  Can't wait until we get to see them again.  

I could put thousands of pictures of them, they are just too cute :)
2. Christmas Presents!
what Jen got

what Scott got

If you like history, parody, and sarcasm this is the book for you
This is our new favorite game.  If you like trivia games then this is a must!  It's so much fun, we're obsessed!
We are lucky to have family who spoils us :)

3. I loved spending time in Logan.  We got to eat at Old Grist Mill which was a highlight. My in-laws make fun of me because I was excited to eat in Logan  haha.  We also ate at Costa Vida and Firehouse... nothing in Eugene will ever compare!  haha

4. High School girls reunion!
 We ate some good food and had so much fun chatting about good old high school.  It's fun because we've all remained friends even though we're at different stages.  some are married, some are not. some have graduated, some have not. We live in Oregon, Nicki in Connecticut, Kelli in Washington DC.  Melissa and her husband have a house!  A real life house. Madison just got back from a mission.  so crazy how different our lives are!  It was so fun to catch up with everybody.

5. Christmas parties, New Years, a call from Elder Stevenson, breakfast with old friends, seeing extending family, eating my mom's pecan pie, sleeping in, seeing everybody in the home ward, wedding dress shopping for my sister-in-law, all highlights of the trip!
The Downs:
1. Emergency Appendectomy
 Crazy right??  We thought so.  On the evening of the 23rd, Scott had a headache and as we were going to bed he said he just didn't feel very well.  During the night he kept getting up to throw up or go to the bathroom. (My parents furnace wouldn't turn on the at night which didn't help either)  When we woke up on the 24th he was feeling awful.  At first we thought it was just a stomach bug or something.  I kept getting ready and doing other things.  I came back downstairs and Scott was doubled over in SO MUCH PAIN. It was really sad for me :(  We decided that we might need to be seen so we hopped in the car and when to an urgent care.
The doctor at the Urgent Care asked a few questions did some tests.  We were there maaaybe 15 minutes and he explained to us that he was fairly certain that it was his appendix and that we needed to go to the ER. so off we went...
Luckily the doctor at the Urgent Care called up to the ER so they were all ready for us when we got there.  Once we were roomed and they gave Scott an IV and some painkillers he was feeling much better.  They took him to do a CT scan and about 30 minutes later the doctor came in and said "yep, it's your appendix.  The surgeon will be in to talk to you".  Everything happened really fast!  The surgeon came and talked to us and not long after that they were wheeling him away to the OR.  
Its funny how something that small in comparison the the stuff around it can be the cause of so much pain for somebody as manly and strong as my husband.
We are actually really lucky that this all happened when it did.  We were surrounded by support from both our families, it wasn't in the middle of a semester, he still had long enough to recover before flying.  Although it was hard to me to miss the fun and excitement of Christmas Eve and Christmas morning it really was the best timing for everything. Funny how things just "work out" like that :)
The surgery was only about 45 minutes and the surgeon came and told us that everything went well. He also brought us some pictures of Scott's insides which I will spare you from.  We had to spend the night in the hospital so I slept on the lovely recliner chair provided for visitors and Scott had to sleep with oxygen tubes in his nose and leg compression socks.  The best nights sleep, let me tell ya!  Luckily we didn't have to stay long on Christmas and got to go home about 10:30.  Scott was a little out of it for a few days but we still managed to enjoy ourselves.
2. Ridiculous Airlines
Scott came to Logan earlier than I did when we made plans to go to Boise for the Aggies bowl game so he missed his flight from Eugene to Logan. Later he got an e-mail saying that since he missed the first flight they were canceling his flight home. SO LAME! After calling them a few times and being on hold for 45 minutes he was able to convince them that he did indeed need to get back to Eugene.  So frustrating. 
3. Broken Christmas Toys

When Scott opened his Kindle to start playing with it there was a big smudge on the screen that wouldn't go away.  He actually asked me if I would go on Christmas to try and exchange it.  ummmm, no. Any store that carries Kindle's in Logan had them out of stock anyway so we couldn't take it back. He called Amazon and had another lovely call to a customer service operator.  I think they were a little nicer than our friends over a Delta Airlines though.  They asked him a bunch of question like "Have you dropped it?  Has anything been dropped on it? Has it been in contact with liquid?" (which if your trying to get them to replace something why would somebody ever say yes??)  Once he passed to their satisfaction they promptly send a new Kindle and we had to send the broken one back.

Overall the break was fabulous and I would have stayed longer if we could.  I enjoy being in Eugene and making new friends and only having my husband to rely on but I really do miss my family and the familiarity of Logan.  Hopefully we make it back sooner than later!